I’m not sure what the problem is, exactly, but everyone I talk to rates 2017 somewhere between “meh” and “horrible.” It just hasn’t been a favorite year for a lot of people. Admittedly, I’m one of those. Sort of.
Honestly, the year started off well, but it went sideways fairly early and never fully recovered.
I spent the year fighting with severe vitamin D and iron deficiencies, as well as the immense fatigue that goes with them. I never finished the 100 Days project I started. I pushed myself to do it for a while, but I hit the point where I would think, “I’m too tired right now. Later.” Later would become tomorrow, which turned into the next day. And suddenly, it was November and I needed to buy a turkey for Thanksgiving dinner.
That’s basically how every project I started, or wanted to start, went this year. Now the year is ending and I feel like Rip van Winkle. Settled in for a nap, woke up with no idea where or when I was.
Somewhere in there, both of our boy cats died shortly after their fifth birthday. Our beloved Maggie Mae, a tiger-striped pit mix who epitomized the phrase “puppy dog eyes,” passed away less than two weeks before her 14th birthday.
But there were good things. Since sunlight is the best way to treat a vitamin D deficiency, I spent a lot of time at the lake, dragging my kids around the hiking trails until I thought they’d have to drag me back to the car. I would absolutely wear myself out and need a couple of days to recover, but it was worth it.
I finally grasped the idea of being present in the moment. When you’re too tired to do anything, you start to genuinely enjoy the times you can do things. Even laundry is kind of awesome. When you’re not busy doing, you have time to do nothing but love the sound of your kids laughing until their faces are red and their eyes are watery. I don’t necessarily enjoy every moment, but I’m in it instead of mentally wandering on to the next thing.
I’ve gotten a lot of clarity this year, too. Noticing which things and people I was wishing I had the energy for, and which barely crossed my mind, helped me pick up on where my priorities really are. Of course, not all of those are the priorities I’m supposed to have, or so I’ve been told, which explains why it was so difficult to be crystal clear about them in the first place.
So, it’s time to close out a year of learning, and begin unfolding a year of potential where those lessons can be applied. I’ve spent the week reflecting and figuring out where I want to go, and I’ll spend some time on New Year’s Eve getting my goals and plans in writing. Well, more organized writing than my scribbled notes, anyway.
Peace and kindness to you, lovelies.